Ah twitter. When you’re good, you’re absolutely great.
Which is all correct.
What they’re conspicuously leaving out is that they are the fucking thing he was struggling against.
Michael fucking Gove had the brass neck to tweet that shit, when he was the fucker who referred to the Good Friday Agreement as a moral stain and compared it to Nazi appeasement.
Never not at it, I swear.
They start by having the Doctor (and sort of Rose) as their ‘in common’ thing and they meet up for a drink and have a good old complain session (Martha wins because of ‘walk the world while a nutso Time Lord has conquered Earth’ beats ‘he got me accused of my girlfriends murder’ hands down.)
But they find as time goes on that they’d rather talk about the stuff going on in their own lives now, whenever they meet up for drinks.
They’re both free-lancing for Torchwood and occasionally for UNIT.
Mickey wins tickets to a West End show and asks Martha if she’d like to go, because why not? (He only entered the raffle because the ticket proceeds went to charity.)
Martha thinks ‘well why not?’
(Her romance with Tom Milligan hasn’t worked out. Not really Tom’s fault either, but it turned out neither Martha nor Tom could do a long-distance relationship. She’s just glad they figured it out before the wedding. They’re still friends and they message each other occasionally. Mostly ‘hey check out this funny meme’)
So they go. They both get dressed up (and have a brief moment of ‘oh she/he’s gorgeous’) and sit in the very good seats that the tickets were for. The show is amazing and funny and the cast are brilliant. Martha & Mickey have a fabulous time.
They both realise that they enjoy hanging out a lot and want to do this again. So instead of just meeting up for a drink, they start to do other stuff together. They go ice-skating, they arrange a monthly cinema night and argue about their favourite actors. They go to cons together.
And then someone asks Martha on a date. She’s with Jack at the time (they’re cleaning after up the latest Cardiff rift crisis) and before Martha can say yes or no Jack says ‘she’s already got someone’
Martha’s response is along the lines of ‘what? I have? Since when?’
Jack: Uh yeah, Mickey?
Martha: MIcKEY??
Jack: Yes, Mickey? Mickey Smith?The very hot guy you’ve been going on dates with for months?
Martha: *suddenly realising that she kind of has been dating Mickey* Oh my god.
Jack: Wait, you guys haven’t been dating? Really?? Because if he’s available I know at least three interested parties …
Martha: OHmYGoD.
A lightbulb goes on in Martha’s head. She offers her apologies and rushes out of there. Calls Mickey on the phone and arranges to have lunch with him because she’s got something she wants to ask him.
So she’s there at their favourite café. (We have a favourite café, she thinks, oh my god) and wondering how to make herself ask Mickey on a date-date. Because while she’s just realised that she is very attracted to him, she’s known for a while now that his friendship is very important to her and she never wants to lose it.
And then Mickey says he knows she had something to ask him, but he has something to ask her first, if she doesn’t mind?
Martha nods, expecting it to be a work favour or something. Sure, she says, what is it.
And that’s when Mickey asks her if she’d like to go to dinner with him. At a very fancy restaurant. Like, you know, a date.
A date, says Martha, who can’t quite believe her ears.
Yeah, says Mickey, you know, a proper date-date.
Martha stares at him. He’s blushing, but still meeting her eyes.
I really like you, Mickey says seriously. And I though, I think that maybe you’re interested in me too. Not sure why, cos you’re amazing and beautiful and incredible and I’m just-
Incredibly amazing, says Martha, cutting him off. You’re incredibly amazing Mickey Smith. And you’ve got a fantastic ass. I’d love to go on a date with you.
And they just sit there in their favourite café smiling at each other until Martha’s phone vibrates.
It’s a text from Jack.
SO IS HE AVAILABLE? it says.
NO, Martha texts back. HE’S MINE.
“Well, except for accidentally on the Noverian Colony in the Damascus Gulf,” the Doctor adds cheerfully, “but that’s not legally binding in this solar system. So not married for local purposes.”
There is brief pause, in which their audience tilts their head in confusion. Then Donna speaks.
“Doctor,” she says slowly, frowning at him. “I thought we had that annulled. I distinctly remember you going back to the courthouse with the marriage certificate.”
The Doctor coughs awkwardly. “Ah. Well. I may have, just possibly, lost the certificate halfway back to the courthouse. There was a slight incident with an angry bird. Bit like a goose, not quite as vicious though.” He grins hopefully at Donna.
Donna gives him a Look. “What,” she says flatly.
“Well, you know,” the Doctor replies, “marriage legality is very serious on that planet. Didn’t I tell you this? I’m sure I told you this.”
Donna’s Look intensifies.
“Oh,” the Doctor says sheepishly. “So, turns out, you’re not actually allowed an annulment on Noverian without the original receipt . .” He trails off, giving Donna a smaller, but still just as hopeful grin.
Donna turns back to their now extremely confused acquaintance with a long-suffering sigh. “Okay," she says through gritted teeth, "so we are married, but not in this solar system. Clear?”
The Empty Child/The Doctor Dances remains absolutely amazing.
‘You know most people notice when they’ve been teleported’.
Yes Jack, yes they do. But what you’ve failed to grasp here is that you’re dealing with a pair of total dorks.
Sigh. I wish we'd had a second season of Nine. Or that Christopher Eccleston would do big finish audios.
Imagine the tenth doctor as John Noble, a primary school teacher living with his cousin and grandfather because renting is a nightmare in this economy.
(Sylvia mysteriously won a round the world cruise so she’s not around.)
Imagine John going stargazing with Wilf, laughing when Wilf tells him ‘you’ll be up there one day my boy!’
‘Sure Granddad, on a schoolteachers salary!’
Imagine John and Donna going out for drinks, John getting in a slagging match with someone who mentioned Donna’s failed wedding.
(As far as anyone knows Lance ran off with another woman)
‘Excuse you,’ he yells, ‘my cousin is amazing. You only wish you were as awesome as Donna!’
Donna drags him away before someone can throw a punch.
Imagine John fitting into the Noble family as if he was always there.
Imagine family movie night with John, Wilf and Donna.
Imagine them cooking dinner together, bustling around the kitchen and singing along to the songs on the radio.
John decides to try baking because a school fundraiser is coming up. The kitchen will never look the same, but the cupcakes were amazing.
Donna’s temping again and she’s had the worst day. Imagine her shuffling in the front door, exhausted, having been delayed by traffic for ages. She’s greeted by John. There’s a cup of hot tea for her in his hands and dinner is going to be ready in fifteen minutes.
Donna hugs him tight. ‘You’re the best John Noble. The very best.’
Imagine the Family of Blood turning up. John’s heartbreak when Donna and Wilf explain things to him. He’s not a real person. He doesn’t exist and Donna, (his cousin, his best friend) wants her real friend back. Wilf, the grandfather he loves, is looking at him with guilt & sadness in his eyes.
“You don’t want me,” he chokes out. “You want him. Why can’t I be enough?”
Donna & Wilf, tearing up, assuring John that they do love him. That whether he’s the Doctor or John Noble he’ll always be family. Always.
There’s an explosion, the Family are getting closer. They’ll be found any minute.
‘Alright,’ Donna says firmly, wiping away tears. ‘Where’s that laser gun? Gramps, you and John run for it. I’ll cause a distraction-’
Wilf starts to protest, he’ll cause the distraction, thank you very much. He’s not running out on his grandchildren.
Both Donna and Wilf stop suddenly, cut off by small clicking sound.
John has opened the watch. As a golden glow rises from it, John Noble says his last words: ‘Grandad, Donna, thank you for loving me.’
‘Oh my boy,’ Wilf says, choking up again. ‘That was the easiest thing in the world to do.’
(Later, when the Doctor is talking to the Family of Blood, pulling off a bit of nasal misdirection, so they don’t realise he’s the Doctor until too late, he makes sure to tell them: you could have avoided this. But you chose to threaten my family.)
Years later, one of the Doctor's friends, temporarily lost in the maze of corridors in the Tardis, comes across the Doctor's incredibly seldomly used bedroom. There eye is caught by a very old photograph propped on a bookshelf. It's of three smiling people eating ice-cream. The writing on the back of the photo says ‘John, Donna & Grandad. Easter holidays 09’
I just love their interactions okay? Like, the Doctor is centuries older than Wilf, but when you go by relative age, Wilf is in a much later stage of his life than the Doctor is in his. I see Wilf as constantly giving off a sense of being absolutely ready to be introduced to people as the Doctor’s proud Dad/Grandad.
Like, I firmly believe that Wilf has a picture of the Doctor & Donna in his wallet and if any of his friends asks who they are, Wilf is just like ‘oh they’re my grandchildren’ and proceeds to launch into a long rambling conversation about how they’re off travelling and seeing amazing stuff, but they’re visiting next week to go with Wilf to that new Astronomy exhibit in the museum.
Ten minutes later he realises he referred to the Doctor as ‘my grandson’ at least twice, has a moment of ‘oh. i said That.’ then does the mental equivalent of a shrug.
Ten & Donna do visit later and Wilf’s friend is ‘delighted to meet you, Doctor, your Grandad is so proud of you and Donna, he talks about his grandchildren all the time!’
Donna just gives a little grin and jokes about how her ‘cousin’ has always been the favourite grandson ‘although of course, he is the only grandson, so not much competition. Now if we’re talking grandchildren it's a different story.'
Ten’s brain does a flip and he has to excuse himself so he can have A Moment in private. He ends up sniffling in the bathroom for fifteen minutes.
A Martha/Ten fic that doesn’t denigrate Rose, acknowledges how important she was to the Doctor and doesn't ignore the fact that he was canonically somewhat in love with Rose and understands that that doesn't mean he can't sincerely be in love with Martha as well. (I despise Only One REAL True Love as a trope)
A Donna/Ten fic that doesn’t denigrate Rose and Martha etc, etc you get the picture now.
Also:
A Fic where Rose, Martha and Donna go out for drinks (Meta-crisis? What meta-crisis? Shush!) and spend the entire night absolutely roasting the Doctor before calling him up to take them home because they forgot taxi money.
Just imagine Ten trying to herd three drunk companions into the Tardis while they point at him randomly and just start laughing.
Martha is vacillating between 'You’re My Besht MAte' drunk and 'You Absholute Fucker 1913 really? Really?'
Rose has lost a shoe, giggles every time she looks at Ten and is righteously nodding at him in support of Martha, because A Maid? In 1913? 'Martha you ish a shaint. I would’ve deckedsh him on the firsht day.'
Donna gets halfway through a speech on how he’s a shameless skinny flirt, is sick on his shoes, sighs with relief and then goes off to have a shower.
It's at this point that Rose and Martha start singing pop songs from the early 2000s
Ten regrets all his life choices.
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